The Vanishing Act of Esme Lennox

Esme stares at the sea and tries to regain her composure. There is something about Iris’s father’s birthday that upsets her, but she doesn’t let her thoughts overtake her: “She won’t have it. She will not. Esme slams all the doors, she throws the bolts, she turns the locks” (146). She recalls the blazer incident and decides this is a memory she can manage. She remembers the girls at school teasing her for her unruly hair and birthplace of India. Esme mostly ignores their teasing, but one day, a girl named Catriona McFarlane calls her an “old maid,” and she grabs a protractor and points it at the other girl, calling her a sad, cruel human.

In the present, Esme thinks Iris’s resemblance to her mother is uncanny. Returning to her school memories, Esme resolves that it was Catriona who switched her blazer. Before leaving school, she goes to the coat room to collect her blazer, but finds it is too small. Each girl’s blazer is labeled with their name, and Esme finds her nametag intact, yet can barely put the blazer on for its small size. Later, Esme explains to Kitty what she believes happened, but Kitty dismisses her story, saying that Esme has simply outgrown her blazer. Esme argues “It fitted me this morning” (151), and feels faint as they walk home. She says she hates everything and feels as if she’s waiting for something, but doesn’t know what. Kitty tells Esme to gather herself and go home because Catriona accused her of casting a spell on her, and their father is waiting for her in his study.

In the present, Iris and Esme walk past the ruins of a church. Iris mentions the church’s history of accusing women of witchcraft and torturing them to death in the abbey, but instantly regrets bringing up a gruesome topic in front of Esme. However, Esme is intrigued and asks multiple questions about the story, but Iris changes the subject.

Kitty holds a spoon dressed like a doll for a nursing home group activity, but wants to return to her room. After she throws the spoon on the floor, a nurse ties her shoes. As she stares at the ceiling, trying to remember the word for the light fixture, Kitty remembers that Esme always forgot her gloves when they left the house. The novel cuts to the past, as the girls’ mother angrily tells Kitty to remind Esme about her gloves; Kitty is resentful of this responsibility. Esme hates wearing gloves and sees the practice as pointless. She always plays Chopin on the piano, much to everyone’s dislike, and they beg her to play something else. When Kitty meets Esme after school, she sees a handsome boy named James “Jamie” Dalziel and becomes infatuated with him. While their mothers speak, Kitty and Jamie become acquainted. The pair meet a week later and bond over having younger sisters. When Esme walks by, Kitty can tell Jamie likes her. Kitty resents her sister, especially when Esme behaves strangely—like climbing a tree or reading a book—at parties. The sisters’ peers label Esme “Oddbod” due to her height, but Esme doesn’t care. Kitty also remembers when her grandfather caught a meerkat in a box; she never forgot its fearful expression at being trapped.

In the present, Esme remembers the night when she argued with her father about staying in school. She wants to go to college and pursue a career, but her father forbids her from doing so, saying, “My daughters will not work for a living” (162). Esme stomps her feet and cries while Kitty watches from afar, sewing lace for her wedding trousseau. As her sewing projects grow, Kitty becomes increasingly worried that she won’t find a husband. Two days later, Jamie Dalziel visits, and everyone assumes he is there for Kitty. However, he asks Esme to take him on a tour of the gardens; she quickly devises a lie about hurting her leg and suggests Kitty take him instead.

On a foggy day at school, a shadow approaches Esme and startles her, so she swings her stack of books and hits the person in the face. The shadow is Jamie, whom Esme hardly recognizes as she paid little attention to him when he visited the house. After treating his wound, Jamie asks Esme to go to the movies, but she refuses. He persists, telling her that he admires her refusal to conform to society’s expectations. He says he will invite her mother to tea, forcing Esme to come, but she still refuses. As she walks away, Jamie says she can play his Steinway piano, and this stops her in her tracks. He explains that he’s done research on her and knows more about her than she thinks.

In the present, Iris drives and considers calling Luke, but decides against it, thinking she should end their relationship.

The narrative shifts to the past—to Esme, Kitty, and their mother having tea with Jamie and his mother. Esme feels uncomfortable, not knowing how to contribute to the conversation and fearful of dropping her teacup. She can tell Mrs. Dalziel knows where Jamie got the mark on his face. Mrs. Dalziel asks Ishbel what her daughters’ plans are after school; Esme is angry that they are talking over her, and proclaims that she’s going to travel the world. Jamie laughs, and the other women appear shocked. Ishbel excuses Esme’s comments, but everyone in the room is uncomfortable with the statement hanging in the air. Suddenly, Esme jumps from her chair and asks if she can play the Steinway piano, and Jamie escorts her out of the room, whispering that his mother likes her. Esme doubts it, but Jamie assures her that no matter what anyone thinks, he can have whomever he wants. She asserts that she has no plans to marry, and Jamie says this is the precise reason she will make a good wife; she will match her husband’s tenacity instead of becoming a boring housewife. At the piano, Jamie wraps his hands around Esme’s waist and kisses her neck. He whispers, “You wouldn’t be like that. You wouldn’t be changed at all. I can’t imagine you being changed by anything. And that’s what I want. That’s why I want you” (177). Kitty walks into the room and the pair quickly separate, but Esme can see that her sister is upset.

In the present, Esme pretends to nap in the car and is comforted when Iris turns down the radio to allow her to rest. Esme knows Iris wishes she didn’t have to care for her, but she still feels love for the girl. Attempting to control her emotions, she returns to her memories of New Year’s Eve, when Kitty and her mother left her home alone.

In one memory, Esme sneaks into her mother’s closet to find her lace negligée, and upon finding the green-blue silk garment, she quickly removes her clothes to try it. In the present, Esme represses the memory.

The novel cuts to Kitty’s scattered memories. In one memory, she’s eating yogurt, but decides she doesn’t like the taste or the texture and drops her spoon on the floor. Kitty then remembers when her son, Robert, told her about his divorce, even though he was never legally married to Iris’s mother. She encourages him to work through their problems, but he tells her that their divorce is for the best. Kitty thinks that he was a good father, and enjoyed Iris’s visits. She hoped her son would have other children so Iris wouldn’t be alone because Kitty knows loneliness. She remembers hating the way her husband carefully counted and polished their silverware after each party. Kitty remembers walking in on Jamie and Esme at the piano. She wanted to scream at Jamie about how everyone made fun of Esme.

Content Warning: The following summary includes the sexual assault of a teenage girl.

Iris drives past a house, and Esme finds it strange that they should pass it at the same time she remembers what happened there long ago. The novel cuts to the past, as Esme remembers trying on her mother’s negligée. Esme’s father sees her wearing lingerie, slaps her face, and screams at her to remove the garment. In her haste and shock, Esme becomes tangled in the slip and topples over as her father shouts insults at her. Ishbel and Kitty appear in the doorway, and the former calmly helps Esme remove the slip and puts it away. Kitty fetches Esme’s dress, but their father protests, saying Esme shouldn’t be allowed to attend the upcoming party. Esme’s mother forces her to attend the party as a lesson.

As Ishbel roughly brushes Esme’s hair, she says Esme will marry James Dalziel and get out of the house. Esme protests, but her mother says, “What you want […] does not come into this. The boy wants you. Goodness knows why, but he does” (185). On the way to the party, Kitty is careful not to tear her dress on the holly wreath and Esme wears her ill-fitting dress and carries a sequin-studded purse that Kitty sewed. At midnight, both girls sit and watch the guests dance, and Esme fusses with her uncomfortable dress. Jamie approaches and asks Esme to dance. She tells him to ask her sister, but he loudly says that he doesn’t want to dance with Kitty but Esme. They dance with the other guests, and Esme gets caught up in the revelry. Jamie leads her into a hall, and they continue to dance alone under a chandelier. Before she realizes what’s happening, Jamie leads her into a closet and kisses her. Esme wonders if she likes the kiss, but Jamie presses into her more forcefully, and she feels uncomfortable. He pushes her into a pile of coats and though she fights back, he covers her mouth and sexually assaults her. Esme tries to disassociate from the physical and emotional pain, and loses track of time; she later finds herself outside, looking for Kitty. Mrs. Dalziel speaks to Esme, but all she can do is let out a strange squeaking sound. The woman drives Esme home and tells her parents that she drank too much at the party. The next day, when Ishbel asks Esme what happened the previous night, she screams.