The Lost Boy

David’s mother is an abusive alcoholic who mistreats David for much of his early childhood. Although she has five sons, she chooses David as the special target of her manipulation and abuse. She forces him to sleep in the garage, denies him adequate nourishment, and at times turns physically abusive. According to David, she sees her abuse as a game that she plays to manipulate him into remaining under her control. Eventually, David’s teachers realize that he is being mistreated at home and notify the police, who remove him from his mother’s care. After David is placed in foster care, his mother continues to manipulate him by threatening to get him back and telling him that she will find out if he is not “good.” Later, she tries to have David taken out of the foster care system and placed in a mental institution by claiming that David was so “incorrigible” that she had to use unconventional methods to control him. At other times, she does show some affection toward David, such as when she cries when they say goodbye after the judge makes him a ward of the court, or much later, when he tells her that he is joining the Air Force. However, David can never be certain if she truly cares about him or if she is just trying to manipulate him. The memoir hints that in addition to her alcoholism, David’s mother has some sort of severe, undiagnosed mental illness, which makes her unstable and abusive toward her children. In time, David realizes that his foster mothers–especially Lilian Catanze and Alice Turnbough–have given him more love and support than his biological mother was capable of.

David’s father is a firefighter with a severe drinking problem. While David is still living at home, his father recognizes that his wife is abusing David but fails to take steps to adequately protect his children. Instead of defending David, he tells him to try not to antagonize his mother so that life will be easier for the family. After David is put in foster care, his father fails to visit him, even though David’s social workers and probation officers try to explain how much a visit would mean to David. The only time his father visits him is when he goes to Hillcrest, to confront David about the charge of arson.

David spends most of his adolescence longing for his father’s love and validation. Many years later, David decides to get in touch with his father and goes looking for him in San Francisco. When they finally reconnect, David realizes that his father’s alcoholism and fragile health will make it impossible for them to have a relationship at this stage in their lives. In the Epilogue, Dave reveals that he has named his son “Stephen” after his father and shows how he and his son have the close relationship that he always longed to have with his own father. 

Russell is one of David’s younger brothers. Although David has very little contact with his brothers after he is put in foster care, he encounters Russell again while he is living with Vera and Jody near his old home and attending the junior high school near his brothers’ elementary school. He can tell by Russell’s state of dishevelment and malnourished look that his mother has begun to mistreat her other children in his absence. After their first encounter, David goes to the elementary school with Carlos in the hope that he will be able to talk to Russell and help him. However, when they get to the elementary school, they see David’s mother with Russell and run away to keep her from catching up with them.

Ms. Gold is the social worker from the Child Protection Services agency who takes David’s case when he is removed from his parents’ custody. David describes her as an “angel” whose “long, shiny blond hair and bright face matched her name” (45). While David is living with Aunt Mary, Ms. Gold frequently meets with him at the house and interviews him about his life with his mother. Her reports play a key role in building a case to have David made a permanent ward of the court. During their time together, Ms. Gold gradually wins David’s trust, and they develop a close bond. She treats David with the affection and kindness that was missing in his previous relationships with adults, and right before the trial, she tells David she loves him–the three words he always longed to hear from his mother.

Lilian is David’s first permanent foster mother for the first year and a half that he is a ward of the court. Lilian and her husband have had many foster children over the years and make an effort to stay in touch with all of them. She and David become particularly close, and during their time together, she becomes an important mother figure in his life. When his biological mother tries to have him institutionalized, Lilian and Rudy fight as hard as they can to keep David in the foster-care system, so they can remain his legal guardians. Although at first David is only comfortable calling Lilian “Mrs. Catanze,” he eventually starts to call her “Mom.” David and Lilian are devastated when he is taken away from the Catanze home not long after he finishes serving his sentence in the juvenile penitentiary.

Rudy is Lilian’s husband and David’s foster parent during the year and a half that he lives with the Catanzes. Rudy is very fond of David, but he becomes increasingly frustrated with his bad behavior, especially when he learns that David is stealing from local stores. When David is accused of starting a fire at school, Rudy takes him to Hillcrest, the juvenile youth hall.

Alice and Harold Turnbough originally serve as David’s temporary foster parents when there is no space for him in any of the other local foster homes. They are initially reluctant to take him because they are not licensed to keep male foster children and will have to make him sleep on the couch since he cannot share a room with the girls. In time, the Turnboughs become fond of David and choose to become his permanent foster parents. David particularly admires and respects Harold, who represents everything that he wishes he could have found in his own father. Since Harold is a talented carpenter, David fantasizes about working on a building project that would bring him and his surrogate father close together. The Turnboughs play an important role not only in nurturing David but also in teaching him about responsibility and adult life. They encourage David to start thinking about what he wants to do with his life, and Alice even attempts to teach him how to cook. By the time David joins the Air Force, he has realized that Alice and Harold are more his parents than his own mother and father ever were.

Michael Marsh is a man who befriends David while he is living in Duinsmoore. After recognizing that David is a troubled teenager who could use some support, he and his wife, Sandra, start to invite David into their home and teach him better manners and habits. He calls David “Slim” and frequently teases him by telling him to “get some” after hearing the story of how he was turned away from a girl’s door by her mother who is prejudiced against foster children. As the Walshes begin to fight more, the Marshes’ home becomes David’s “safe haven” (282). He goes to their house to spend time with the family and to read books in Michael’s vast collection of works about “movies, race cars, and airplanes” (282). Through reading Michael’s books, David becomes increasingly interested in aircrafts and starts thinking about joining the Air Force. In time, Michael becomes an important father figure and role model in David’s life.

David meets John when he is in sixth grade and living with Lilian and Rudy Catanze. John has “scraggly, long black hair,” “thin, worn-out clothes” and “a distinctive walk” (171). When he sees that David is being teased for being a foster child, John befriends David and tells him that he knows what it is like to be picked on since his father used to beat him and his mother before his parents separated. John tells David he can join his gang if David slashes one of their teacher’s car tires. Later, John asks David to serve as the “lookout” when John tries to burn down Mr. Smith’s classroom. When the fire gets out of control, John runs away and puts all the blame for the fire on David. Because of John’s actions, David is charged with arson.

“Big Larry” (as opposed to Larry Jr.) is one of David’s foster brothers while he is living with Lilian and Rudy. When David moves into the house, the older Larry befriends him and takes him to see a James Bond movie. During their time as foster brothers, Big Larry and David go on many adventures together.

Larry Jr. is another one of David’s foster brothers while he is living with the Catanzes. Soon after David moves in with the Catanzes, Larry Jr. begins to pick on the younger boy and harasses him about his abusive mother. Lilian describes Larry as being at a “rebellious” age when he “wants to fight everything and everyone” (96) and tells David to do his best to ignore him.

Chris is another foster child living with the Catanzes. He has cerebral palsy and keeps to himself because he fears being mocked by the other kids, especially Larry Jr. He is concerned because he is almost eighteen and will soon be too old for foster care. Chris’s example forces David to start thinking about what he will do when he turns eighteen and has to fend for himself.

Linda and John Walsh are a couple in their twenties with three small children who serve as David’s foster parents while he is a teenager. David moves with them to a new housing development on a street called Duinsmoore Drive. David is happy living in Duinsmoore, but when the Walshes’ frequent quarrels start to become violent, he asks his probation officer to move him to a different home.

Joanne and Michael Nulls serve as David’s foster parents for a few months while he is in junior high school. “Mrs. Nulls,” as she tells David to call her, is very kind but frustrates David by treating him like a “toy doll” (234). She forbids him from going anywhere on his bike and insists on washing his hair for him. Michael, who works at the post office, has a more “easygoing nature” (234). He and Joanne fight constantly, which reminds David of his own parents’ violent quarrels. After a couple months, he is removed from the home after Mrs. Nulls tells him that she and Michael are getting a divorce because her husband has been having an affair.

Vera and Jody Jones are an African-American couple who serve as David’s foster parents for several months while he is junior high school. They live in the same neighborhood as David’s mother, in a house that is very similar to the one in which he used to live with his biological family. After a few months, the foster home is shut down by the county after a former foster child accuses Jody of statutory rape.

When David is sent to the San Mateo County Juvenile Hall, Gordon Hutchenson becomes his assigned probation officer. Gordon is very supportive of David during the trial and his time at Hillcrest. After David finishes his sentence, Gordon is in charge of delivering him to his new foster home. When he learns that there is no space for him in any local foster homes, Gordon takes David to Alice and Harold Turnbough’s home and begs them to take David so that he will not have to take him back to the juvenile hall. 

Dave Howard is a teenager who becomes one of David’s closest friends while he is living with the Walshes on Duinsmoore Drive. Along with their other friend, Paul Brazell, the boys spend their free time practicing stunts on their mini-bikes.

Paul Brazell is David’s other close friend during his teenage years on Duinsmoore Drive. Like David, Paul has a mini-bike, and they spend their free time having drag races and learning stunts.

Mr. Brazell is the father of David’s friend Paul. David admires Mr. Brazell because he is good with his hands and works on interesting mechanical projects in his garage. In time, David realizes that he is “closer to Dan than to [his] own father” (300).

Carlos is “a shy Hispanic boy” whom David befriends while he is living with the Jones’. Carlos speaks very little English but has a lot of common with David, and unlike John, he doesn’t “have a mean bone in his body” (242). Carlos goes with David to the nearby elementary school to see David’s brother, Russell, and helps him run away when his mother spots David.

Mary is an older woman who has many foster children, all of whom call her “Aunt Mary.” Her house is the first foster home David lives in after he is taken away from his parents.

Uncle Lee is David’s father’s “long-time partner and best friend,” who worked with him at the fire station in San Francisco (292). When David goes in search of his father in San Francisco, he encounters Uncle Lee at his father’s old fire station, who tells him that his father had to retire early because of his drinking. 

Stan is another of David’s younger brothers. He breaks David’s bike when he and his mother visit David at the Catanzes’ house.