The Braggart Soldier

“Make her hurry— – that’s unless she’d rather see her faithful slaves, just for her affair become fraternal brothers— – on the cross!” 

The Henry Thomas Riley version notes that Palaestrio’s use of the phrase “faithful slaves” is adapted from Plautus’s use of the word “contubernales,” which implies that they are her fellow slaves or equals. Since Philocomasium was kidnapped by Pyrgopolynices, she has essentially existed as a slave in his house. If the soldier discovers that Philocomasium has been sneaking over to see Pleusicles in secret, Palaestrio and any other slave who helped her risks execution by crucifixion. The willingness of Palaestrio and his fellow slaves to put their lives on the line to help Pleusicles and Philocomasium shows that they are noble and honorable, unlike the soldier. 

“Also tell the girl to see to it she doesn’t lose her woman’s ingenuity. Have her practice up her tricks and female shrewdness. […] She must force the fellow who found her into full forgetfulness. Even if he saw here a hundred times, have her deny it. Wiles she has, guiles, she has, very smoothing smiles she as. ‘Seasoned’ women never have to get their spices at the grocer’s— – their own garden grows the pepper for their sharp and saucy schemes.” 

In this description, Palaestrio affirms that women have their own powers and tools of self-sufficiency to assert influence, especially upon men. Although some scholars have suggested that garden metaphor might refer to a woman’s culmination of and access to an array of figurative poisons, the Henry Thomas Riley annotated translation notes that this is unlikely the meaning. Palaestrio’s language describing women does not designate them as harmfully manipulative but rather clever and easily able to sway a dim-witted man.

“Well, look at him! Standing pensive, pondering profundities with wrinkled brow. Bravo! Molto bello, standing slave wise and theatrically. He won’t rest at all today until he finds the plan he’s seeking.” 

Periplectomenus’s admiration of Palaestrio fits into Plautus’s deconstruction of social hierarchy that places a slave as the protagonist. As a respected older man, Periplectomenus offers his respect to Palaestrio, treating him as not only an equal, but a leader. The trope of the clever slave has appeared in plays before and after this one, but Plautus’s Palaestrio was the first clever slave to act as the hero of the piece. 

“I’m astonished I’m admonished so. […] I could make a dozen decent damsels devils with my surplus shrewdness!” 

When Palaestrio reminds Philocomasium to heed the directions he gave her, he admits, “I’m worried you’re not slippery enough” (12). Philocomasium responds indignantly. Acroteleutium and Milphidippa are worldlier than Philocomasium, and their ability to manipulate is expected. As the young lover of the piece, Philocomasium’s life has presumably been much more sheltered. However, she demonstrates that not only is she highly intelligent, but her ability to scheme is an innate part of being a woman. She proves that she is not innocent and dimwitted like her lover, Pleusicles, but extremely clever and inventive.

“Let’s investigate this further. Sceledra— – are we ourselves— – or are we other people now? Maybe, unbeknownst to us, one of our neighbors has transformed us!” 

Although Sceledra is correct in believing that she saw Philocomasium kissing Pleusicles, Palaestrio is attempting to misdirect her by mocking her for believing her own eyes. His joke about being transformed by one of the neighbors actually resonates truth, as his co-conspirators all most transform themselves into someone they are not in order to fool their neighbor. 

“All the king’s horses and all the king’s men could never act with such great daring. Never be so calm, so cool, in anything, as one small woman! Deftly she delivered up a different accent for each part! How the faithful guard, my doxy fellow slave, was fully flim-flammed! What a source of joy for all— – this passage passing through the wall!” 

Throughout the play, the men repeatedly underestimate the women, reminding them of their roles and doubting their abilities to pull off the ruse. Once in a whileOccasionally, however, Palaestrio gives credit where it is due by acknowledging the deftness with which the women take on different personas and improvise as necessary. When Sceledra runs back and forth between the two houses hoping to catch Philocomasium out of place, Palaestrio worries that Philocomasium will not carry it off. However, he is delighted to discover that not only does she follow instructions, but she puts on a different accent to play her own twin, completely flummoxing Sceledra.

“Now be smart: keep all of this a secret. Slaves should always know more than they tell.” 

As the clever slave character, Palaestrio must remain shrewd. He demonstrates that even while a slave is pretending to be loyal, he or she must be open and listening for leverage. He advises Sceledra to keep the secret of seeing Philocomasium and confronting her, reminding her that she does not have to simply do the soldier’s bidding. In this case, Palaestrio urges her to consider her own self-preservation and keep the incident to herself.

“Now, after this, by Hercules, you guard your tongue and even if you know a thing, don’t know a thing.” 

Periplectomenus confronts Sceledra for daring to accuse his houseguests of kissing. He suggests that “a slave should have his eyes downcast, his hands and tongue in strict control— – his speech as well” (21). While this seems to imply that a slave must be respectful and deferent, it has a double meaning, as confirmed by his advice to guard her tongue. Periplectomenus is telling Sceledra to think for herself and to be careful,  – even strategic,  – about what she says.

“By Hercules, I won’t snap at their bait today. I’ll run off somewhere, hide myself a day or two, till this commotion quiets and the shouting stops. I’ve earned myself much more than one man’s share of troubles.” 

Sceledra admits that she knows that Palaestrio, Periplectomenus, and Philocomasium are trying to trick her. However, she heeds the advice of Palaestrio and Periplectomenus and decides to stay quiet. Rather than risk trouble, by either lying or telling the truth, she resolves to hide out for a few days until the trouble clears. As a slave, she does not need the possible ramifications of participating in the ruse on either side. 

“Commanding’s easy when your troops are good.”

Palaestrio is giving credit where it is due by praising his fellow conspirators. This comment shows that he is the direct opposite of the braggart soldier, by showing humility at praise rather than self-aggrandizement.

“You’re a novel lover if you blush at doing anything! You’re no lover— – just the palest of shadow of what lovers should be.” 

Palaestrio criticizes Pleusicles for being bashful about doing whatever needs to be done to rescue Philocomasium. Although Pleusicles does step up to play his part, Palaestrio demonstrates that he is much braver and more mature than his Ephesian master. 

“What storms I’m stirring up— – what mighty machinations! Today I’ll snatch that concubine back from the soldier— – that is, if all my troops remain well disciplined.” 

Once again, Palaestrio uses military language to describe the ruse and his role as the leader. This places him in direct contrast with the soldier. This time, rather than displaying humility that the soldier doesn’t possess, he shows the bravery that far surpasses that of Pyrgopolynices. Creating “storms” and “mighty machinations” are the acts of gods. While Palaestrio actually does these things, Pyrgopolynices simply compares himself to gods. He claims to be Venus’s grandson, inheriting her qualities rather than earning them. 

“Do me a favor, will you? If while I’m away there’s punishment distributed…please take my share.” 

Lurcio’s clever bit of dialogue demonstrates Plautus’s comic use of language. This plays on the word “distributed” by joking that punishment, which can certainly be distributed, is a thing of which one person can offer another their share as if it is a gift. From the drunken Lurcio, the line implies an intoxicated muddling of misunderstood language rather than deviousness. This is Lurcio’s only scene. Like Sceledra, he chooses to hide away rather than face potential punishment at the hands of an unjust master.

“Now don’t you think I’d be a stupid idiot to undertake an unfamiliar project or to promise you results, if I were unacquainted with the whole technique— – the art of being wicked? […] A layman’s words are little use. Why didn’t I myself, the minute that I drank the smallest drop of your proposal, didn’t I tell you the way the soldier could be swindled?”

Acroteleutium demonstrates that she is the authority in the room when it comes to fooling men. Palaestrio’s careful and ingenious plan requires that the women can use their own wiles in ways that Palaestrio cannot direct them. Like Palaestrio, Acroteleutium and the other women show that they are underappreciated for their brilliance. While men treat them as if their only value is their beauty, Acroteleutium not only has the intellectual resources to manipulate them, but the shrewdness to take on challenges that she knows she can handle.

“But when it’s wickedness or wiles that’s wanted of the woman, why then she’s got a monumentally immortal memory. It’s only when it comes to something fine or faithful that suddenly she’s scatterbrained— – and can’t remember.” 

Acroteleutium implies that even women who have the reputation of being silly or empty-headed will become sharp and clever when they need to be wicked or manipulate a man. She says that all women have the ability to use their wiles and be deceitful when necessary. This becomes apparent when Philocomasium, who ought to be the innocent ingenue, demonstrates that she is just as powerful a manipulator as Acroteleutium.

“Remember if you’re dealing with a first-rate architect, and if this man designs a ship with well-drawn plans, you’ll build the ship with ease if everything’s laid out and set. Now we’ve a keel that’s accurately laid and nicely set, our architect has helpers who are not exactly… amateurs, so if our raw material is not delayed en route, I know our capabilities— – we’ll have that ship in no time.”

Acroteleutium praises Palaestrio as a leader, suggesting that when the schemer is good, the plans will be carried out— – as long as none of his co-conspirators drop the ball. She expresses confidence in the abilities of the group, which apply especially to the women. As the men constantly question whether the women can handle the instructions they’ve been given, Acroteleutium shows the opposite. She doesn’t question them. Acroteleutium refers to his helpers as “not exactly…amateur” (30), which implies that perhaps Acroteleutium and her maid are professional sex workers. 

“But it’s best to go slow, for I’m sure you well know of the kind of low mind that her stock has.”

Palaestrio encourages Pyrgopolynices to underestimate Milphidippa, setting her up to appear guileless in her false worship of the soldier. This primes the soldier to believe what she says without question as she drowns him in praise and flattery.

“Now you don’t have to harp, I’ve got everything sharp. As I showed you before, I’m quite clever.” 

Like the other women, Milphidippa must repeatedly remind the men that she is capable of handling her role in the scheme. It becomes a running gag that none of them trust anyone but themselves to follow simple instructions. Even as a maid, whose status would not be much different from Palaestrio’s, Milphidippa has the cleverness to carry out the plan.

“What a clever young dame— – she remembers my name.” 

While Palaestrio recognizes that the women are smart and capable, the idiotic soldier repeatedly demonstrates that he believes that women are all brainless. Much of the soldier’s downfall occurs because he does not understand that women are people and not simply pretty things. He kidnapped Philocomasium because he believed that she could not have the free will and individuality to choose not to be interested in him. He believes the women when they fool him, because he imagines that he is much more intelligent than they are and that they are therefore harmless.

“He’s not human— – you’re right, no debating. [Aside] Why, it couldn’t be plainer. A vulture’s humaner than he is.” 

In this play on words, Palaestrio turns the phrase in which Milphidippa calls the soldier “godlike” (36),, or beyond human, to describing the soldier as less than human. A vulture feeds off of dead carcasses, which are easy prey rather than fighting for itself. Similarly, the soldier takes the easy route, grabbing what he can without taking risks or working hard.

“To be frank, I’ve got wealth beyond measure: Ssilver too, not in pounds, no, not even in mounds, but in mountains, like Aetna— – or higher.” 

Pyrgopolynices is exaggerating his great wealth by placing it in mythically impossible terms. His reference to Mount Aetna is an example of Plautus’s tendency to inundate his plays with references to Greece as if to prove that the play is indeed meant to be set there. 

“The women he lies with he fecundifies with real heroes— – and would you believe it— – the children he rears live for eight hundred years.” 

Palaestrio flatters Pyrgopolynices by telling Acroteleutium that he has mythical qualities. Of course, not only is this a ridiculous claim, it is impossible to substantiate because Pyrgopolynices himself has not claimed to have lived for hundreds of years, so how could he have fathered children who have already lived so long? This demonstrates the soldier’s well-developed blind spot that allows him to believe anything he hears that praises him, no matter how ridiculous.

“If I were not aware how many others have done awful things because of love, I’d be afraid to march around dressed like this to win my love.” 

Pleusicles seems to be new at the game of proving his love. Earlier, Palaestrio chastised him for feeling embarrassed that he was relying on Periplectomenus for help. Palaestrio, in the name of his master’s love, traveled the ocean, was attacked by pirates and re-enslaved, and made allies in new city in order to help reunite the lovers. Pleusicles is proud of this tiny step, in which he wears a silly outfit. Pleusicles is a good person, but not particularly clever. He does, however, manage to carry off the disguise (with substantial help from Philocomasium and the others).