My Friends

Hosam flew into London from Benghazi the night before. From London he was heading to Paris, where he’d fly to his new home in San Francisco and meet his wife Malak and daughter Angelica. In the cab from the airport, Hosam didn’t mention the past five years he’d spent in Libya. Instead, he talked about his late father, who had bought land in Northern California’s Point Reyes years prior. Seeing Hosam’s old backpack reminded Khaled of their past and the years when Hosam and his ex-girlfriend Claire would visit the River Dart.

The friends arrived at Khaled’s flat in Shepherd’s Bush Green, where he’s lived for many years. Inside, Hosam washed his face and discussed the London sites he wanted to revisit. Khaled wondered if the ghosts of Hosam’s past would follow him to California.

In the morning, Khaled and Hosam took the bus to Marble Arch. Along the way, Khaled considered everything Hosam had experienced in recent years, including falling in love with Malak and participating in Muammar Qaddafi’s capture and assassination.

Malak texted Hosam about how much she loved California while Khaled and Hosam were out at a café. Hosam wondered aloud if moving there was the right choice. Khaled wasn’t sure how to respond, still surprised by how their lives had changed over the years. Khaled himself had come to London in September 1983 and hadn’t returned to Benghazi since. Sitting with Hosam, Khaled imagined their other friend, Mustafa al Touny, joining them.

Khaled and Hosam met in 1995. They were 29 and 35, respectively. Khaled knows their friendship has changed, but Hosam recently called Khaled his truest friend.

At the station, Khaled continues watching Hosam. Hosam told him to stay put when they said goodbye, but Khaled has the impulse to go after him. He chases Hosam through the station but doesn’t call out to him.

Khaled leaves the station and walks through the London streets, remembering the years before he and Hosam became friends. He first heard about Hosam on the BBC Arabic World Service in 1980. In an unprecedented broadcast, the London reporter Mohammed Mustafa Ramadan read Hosam’s short story “The Given and the Taken” on air. The story was brief, but moved and disturbed Khaled. His parents and sister Souad were enamored with it, too.

Khaled’s father Ustath Kamal Abd al Hady fell in love with Hosam’s story. Kamal was a historian and teacher. In 1969, he began teaching at the middle school to disguise his political affiliations from Qaddafi’s regime. However, he remained “obsessed with the political history of the Arab World” (25). He researched Hosam’s past and discovered his family’s connection to the former King Idris. Since the family was later involved in the resistance to the Italian invasion, they were penalized under Qaddafi’s regime. Khaled’s parents argued about the Zowa family’s history because their loyalties often seemed to shift. Then Kamal discovered the Zowas lived in the same neighborhood. One day, Khaled found their house and stood outside, imagining Hosam’s life inside.

Walking down Euston Road, Khaled is overcome by longing. He wonders how his life would’ve been different if he’d returned to Libya, but also wishes he could forget the past.

His mind returns to Mohammed Mustafa Ramadan’s journalism and broadcasting career. He was later one of the journalists killed in “The Killing of the Word,” a campaign that violently eliminated outspoken reporters.

Khaled walks to Regent’s Park, studying his surroundings on the way. Once there, he remembers the report of Mohammed Mustafa Ramadan’s disappearance and murder in 1980 in this place. He imagines what Mohammed was feeling the night he died and how his judgment had failed him.

Khaled remembers listening to the report of Mohammed’s death with his family. His parents were initially upset, but then ended up blaming Mohammed for being careless.

In the months following Mohammed’s assassination, Khaled began reading the international journals Kamal brought home. In one, he discovered Professor Henry Walbrook’s essay, “The Consequences of Meaning in the Infidelities of Translation.” The essay moved him, and three years later he enrolled at the University of Edinburgh where Walbrook taught. Before Khaled left for England in 1983, his parents warned him not to get stuck there. Khaled was unsure what they meant.

Khaled was immediately swept up by his new life in Edinburgh. He befriended another student, Saad, who introduced him to Mustafa. Mustafa revealed that he’d studied under Kamal in Benghazi. He and Khaled became fast friends, connecting over reading and books.

Khaled remembers his first months in England as some of the happiest in his life. Through Saad and Mustafa he met Rana Lamesse. They stayed close for years, but nothing romantic happened between them. Khaled wonders how things would’ve been different if he’d acted on his feelings. He also remembers when he began studying under Walbrook and how quickly they connected.

Khaled continues walking through Soho, reflecting on his 32 years in the city. He remembers all of the letters his mother used to write and the way his and Mustafa’s friendship developed.

One day, Mustafa informed Khaled there was a protest taking place outside the Libyan embassy in London. They made plans to go together.

Khaled and Mustafa traveled to London, where they booked a room at a Soho hotel. They spent the night planning for the next day’s demonstration. They bought balaclavas in preparation, worried they’d be penalized by the regime if anyone recognized them.

The day of the demonstration, Khaled and Mustafa had breakfast and headed out to the embassy. Feeling energized, they greeted everyone on their way to St. James’s Square. They donned their masks when they arrived.

Khaled was surprised by the turnout at the demonstration. Mustafa pulled him through the crowd. They had agreed to stay only a short time to fulfill their duty, before leaving and enjoying themselves in the city for the rest of the day.

All of a sudden, the people started shouting. Men emerged from the embassy windows and began shooting. Khaled and Mustafa were both shot.

Noise filled the square and the people scattered. Khaled saw that Mustafa was also wounded but didn’t go to him. Instead, he stumbled out of the square clutching his wounds. Finally he stopped on a side street where a man called an ambulance on his behalf.

When the paramedics arrived, he gave them Rana’s name as his next of kin. Meanwhile, he thought of Mustafa, feeling guilty and confused. At the hospital, the doctor began yelling for help when he saw Khaled’s injuries.

Khaled visits St. James’s Square for the first time in 32 years. He’s deliberately avoided the site since the shooting. Upon arriving, he notices a plaque commemorating the demonstration.

After he emerged from his operation, Khaled was surprised when the doctor called him “Fred.” Then a kind nurse began attending to him. He realized they were using this false name to protect his identity. He began to cry, realizing the shooting had changed his life.

Khaled grew close with his nurse, Rachel Clement, during his hospital stay. Eleven days later, he and Mustafa were finally reunited. They discussed what had happened and followed the reports of the event. They learned that Qaddafi had ordered the shooting.

Khaled worried that his family had seen reports in the news and would discover his involvement. He decided to write to them, but ended up writing to Rana instead and informing her where he was. He later wrote to his family, but didn’t mention the shooting.

Meanwhile, Khaled continued listening to the radio. One day, he learned that Hosam was coming out with a book also titled The Given and the Taken. The BBC replayed Muhammad Mustafa Ramadan’s reading of Hosam’s story. Afterwards, the presenter interviewed Hosam, but the connection allegedly failed. Convinced Hosam was fleeing the conflict, Mustafa called him a coward.

Khaled and Mustafa secured a copy of Hosam’s book with the nurse’s help. Khaled read the collection repeatedly and eventually wrote home about it.

A few days later, Rana replied to Khaled’s letter, admitting how worried she’d been and promising to visit. She also warned him not to return to Edinburgh, as many thought the demonstrators were traitors.