Insignificant Events in the Life of a Cactus

“By the time we arrived, Dad’s eyes looked like Atomic Fireballs and Mom’s hair looked like she’d taken a spin in a hairspray cyclone.”

Aven frequently peppers her colorful descriptions with comical similes, revealing both her creative imagination and her sense of humor.

“Before I’d walked five steps, I got my first look.”

Aven is sensitive to the different types of stares she gets from other people that make her feel self-conscious and excluded. Looks are an important symbol, representing the challenge that Aven and others with disabilities face in getting others to accept their differences.

“I guess I’m pretty memorable—must be the red hair.”

Aven often uses gently self-deprecating humor to understate the challenges of her disability. Here she drily comments that Henry remembers her name because of her red hair, rather than her lack of arms, her more obvious physical feature.

“The girls hadn’t met me at all. They hadn’t even asked me my name. No, what they had met were my missing arms. It was all they had seen and all that had interested them.”

People are curious about Aven’s disability, and Aven tries to understand where they are coming from, but she wishes people were more empathetic and interested in her other attributes. She is hurt that the girls did not want to get to know her as a person and to include her socially.

“I am an entirely insignificant event in the life of this cactus.” 

Aven initially thinks of herself and her worries as minor in the grand scheme of things, like the long life of the saguaro. By the end of the novel, however, Aven realizes that she, and everyone, is uniquely valuable. The cactus comes to represent Aven’s strength and significance.

“It was a relief to have someone be so honest about the thoughts in his head.” 

When Aven first meets him, Connor is straightforward about Aven’s disability and his own. Aven appreciates that the two can be themselves together and accept each other fully.

“Why were people always surprised I could do stuff? I bet I’d get surprised looks if I told people I can breathe air without help or swallow my food or pee in the toilet.”

Aven prides herself on doing anything people with arms can do, and dislikes being underestimated. Being disabled does not make her “incapable.” She is irritated when people are impressed with her abilities because their surprise and amazement emphasize how little they expected her to be able to accomplish.

“They don’t know I have Tourette’s. That’s what makes it so embarrassing.” 

If more people understood about Tourette syndrome, Connor believes, he would not feel so uncomfortable being in public. Fewer people would stare at and mock him. Bowling provides information about Tourette’s and other disorders and disabilities in order to educate her readers and encourage them to empathize with and include those who are not like them.

“I knew right at the moment I saw her that I was looking into the face of my daughter. It was like she was born for me right in that moment.”

Mom shares the powerful feelings of connection she felt when she first viewed Aven’s picture on the adoption website. Mom and Dad think of Aven unconditionally as their daughter, and their love forms a powerful support infrastructure for Aven.

“She just sat around like a slug, waiting to be cared for like the Queen of Sheba.” 

When her adoptive parents first met Aven she was fully dependent on her foster family. In contrast, Aven’s parents empower Aven to try her hardest and never give up on a task. This quote reveals Dad’s sense of humor as well as his commitment and love. It also explains Aven’s nickname, Sheebs.

“Who exactly was I trying to convince? The person who’d called me a freak yesterday? Or myself?” 

Aven maintains an outwardly positive attitude, blogging about the perks of not having arms, but she knows how challenging her disability is and wishes at times she were just like the many people around her who have arms. This quote reveals Aven’s rare self-doubt and her self-awareness.

“No one cared about my lack of arms; they were all far too caught up in their own struggles. And I, for once, felt completely normal among this group of misfits.” 

Being with the Tourette’s support group, Aven can empathize with the other kids and not feel self-conscious about her own body. She experiences belonging there.

“Normally I would never want to call attention to myself. But there are times when my temper overwhelms my desire to go unnoticed.”

This quote reveals the importance Aven places on friendship. Despite her dislike of others’ critical attention, Aven risks their stares to defend Connor from bullies. Aven shows bravery in support of her friend—a quality she believes is a part of being a good friend.

“That’s almost crossing the line into making fun of instead of making fun with.”

Andrea articulates one of the support group rules that reveals the difference between inclusion and exclusion. Making fun of others alienates them from the group and makes them feel bad about themselves. Making fun with others is inclusive. The Tourette’s group is a safe place for everyone to be themselves.

“You’re like a superhero—like a totally awesome armless superhero.”

Dexter celebrates Aven’s ability to do things with her feet, echoing Aven’s own comment that she and Connor are like cool X-Men mutants. Dexter sees Aven as an inspiration.

“But at this moment, as I watched the tear slide down Connor’s cheek, I felt the true loss of not having arms. Because I couldn’t reach over and wipe it away.” 

Aven jokes about things she cannot do without arms, but being unable to comfort her friend affects her powerfully. This quote shows both how important Connor’s friendship is to Aven, and Aven’s empathetic, caring nature.

“I won’t ever be able to do anything with my life.” 

Connor expresses his negative view of himself. Unlike Aven, Connor believes that his disability rules and ruins his life. Connor received critical messaging from his father, and now thinks he cannot do anything, unlike Aven, whose supportive parents instilled in her the belief that she can do anything.

“I am who I am and it’s all I’ve known and all I’ll ever know. No big deal.”

Aven puts on a brave public face, accepting her disability and trying not to let it hold her back, but sometimes it is a “big deal,” like when she feels stared at and excluded. By the novel’s end, Aven admits living without arms is a challenge, but she truly values herself.

“I don’t ever want to be seen just as a disabled person…I don’t want to just be Aven Green, that girl with no arms. I don’t want to be labeled like that.” 

Aven views herself as “abled,” and does not want others to see her only for her disability, rather than for the whole, capable person she is. This quote illustrates Bowling’s focus on inclusion and empathy.

“Don’t be like everyone else, Aven. Be you.” 

Dad thinks being like everyone else is a “terrible thought.” He urges Aven to let her talents, personality, and inner spirit “shine.”

“But there are a lot of hard things in life. Who would I be if I gave up when things got hard?”

By trying out for the soccer team, Aven shows determination and courage. She understands life’s challenges and decides to be someone who faces and overcomes them. Aven makes a positive choice about who she wants to be and what she wants out of life.

“Even smart enough to be an astronaut.”

Connor’s gentle confirmation that Aven can do anything is part apology for his words during the fight and part acknowledgement that he has changed his attitude. Thanks to Aven, Connor realizes that he does not have to let his disability fully define him or hold him back.

“You, Aven Green, are the most interesting person I know.” 

Mom shows her love and pride for Aven, affirming Aven’s originality and newfound sense of self-acceptance.