If Something Happens to Me

“It’s been five years and she is the first person—the first woman—to make Ryan smile.”

This description of Nora interacting with Ryan serves as a compact but forceful characterization of each of them—Ryan is an emotionally scarred man and she is a woman who is special enough to reach past his wounds. Finlay also uses this line to set the timeframe for Ryan’s narrative in relation to Alison’s disappearance. In hindsight, this becomes critically important as a contrast to the lack of chronological indicators in the Philadelphia narrative strand.

“Poppy McGee wakes with a towering figure glaring down at her. On the frayed poster in her childhood bedroom, Beyoncé wears a sequined mini, holds her legs in a wide stance, hands on hips, casting a sultry gaze.”

The novel includes many examples of wry humor, such as this one, which plays with horror tropes of a menacing figure looming over a sleeping woman. The description then subverts the expectation by revealing it as a Beyoncé poster. The icon’s confidence clashes with Poppy’s uncertainty about her life that is encapsulated in the setting of her childhood bedroom.

“She has three things seemingly lost in this world of social-media outrage: perspective, nuance, and empathy.”

This description of Nora explains why Ryan finds her so attractive. He is traumatized by true crime fanatics on social media who declared him guilty of causing Alison harm when she went missing. This line also serves as an unusual moral aside about the harm caused by modern social media culture.

“Chantelle swipes at her phone, then displays a photo. It’s of an envelope. On the outside it says: ‘If something happens to me.’

A spurt of adrenaline shoots through Poppy.”

“If something happens to me” is a phrase designed to build suspense, which makes it appropriate for the title of this novel—it is a phrase that gets repeated multiple times. It is only half of a conditional statement and immediately raises the question of what should be done if “something happens.” The answer is inside the envelope, written in code, which raises the suspense. As Poppy excitedly thinks, it also implies that Alison knew that something bad could happen soon, which then raises the question of how she knew that.

“‘I noticed she didn’t use social. Why was that?’ Poppy asks.

Juliette shrugs. ‘She said it was fake and just makes you sad.’”

This exchange about Alison and social media characterizes Alison’s strength and independence. It is also an unintentionally ironic comment in the sense that “Alison” is a “fake” identity, and she has a very practical reason to avoid social media so the vengeful O’Learys won’t discover her new identity.

“Look, you wanna know why the investigation was crap, look in your own house.”

One of the key ways the novel builds suspense is by having red herrings—ambiguous clues that throw suspicion on multiple innocent people. Here, former deputy Buckman’s warning to Poppy could be construed to implicate Ken, Dash, or Mac—each of whom is innocent—assuming Buckman can be trusted at all.

“The woman is an oddball or genius, Poppy can’t tell which. It’s possible her schtick is just a tactic to get Poppy to talk.”

The way that Fincher talks and pulls in seemingly random ideas (she has just been talking about the Russian tradition of the Holy Fool) leaves most of the characters perplexed. The difficulty of knowing what to make of Fincher helps keep suspense about her role until the end of the book when she is revealed to be an enemy.

“It feels good, telling someone. It’s the first time. Because of the pain and guilt, but also the fear. He’s lost so much already. Friends. Basketball. His name, even. But he’s tired of being afraid.

When Ryan unburdens himself to Nora before meeting Peter Jones, whom Ryan calls “The Monster,” he begins the process of confronting his past in order to escape and move beyond it. The novel emphasizes that this is the first time he is doing this and that Ryan is “tired” of living in fear, explicitly marking this as a turning point in his character development.

“These classmates—these friends—are more than the sum of their cultivated social-media personas, more than the roles they play, more than the stereotypes. They’re like him. Trying to find their way. Trying to find out who they are. They party too much—are maybe too privileged—but they want to make the world kinder, better.”

Ryan is shocked at his classmates’ answers to the question of what they would do if they were not lawyers. He realizes that they are like him, even in the fact that they conceal part of their identities. This underlines the theme of The Illusory Nature of Personal Identities. Ryan realizes that most people pretend and construct false facades about themselves.

“‘We don’t say “commit suicide,”’ Pendleton interrupts. ‘We say “died by suicide.”’

O’Leary feels his blood turning hot. ‘Excuse me.’

‘At the Academy, I mean. We teach the children to not say “committed” suicide since it evokes associations with a crime and fosters negative stereotypes about mental illness.’”

While it is important not to stigmatize the victims of suicide or to ignore mental health issues, this exchange shows Pendleton’s condescension and callousness toward the bereaved father. He is more concerned with projecting the correct image than with dealing with the grief of the parent in front of him. This short exchange reveals him to be a pompous man.

“But on certain days, in a certain light, he doesn’t see his boss, but instead, a sixteen-year-old with a black eye or a cast on his arm and Chaz regrets he was a coward.”

Chaz’s thoughts show the tender side of the cruel killer who is now rethinking his actions and wondering about redemption. He wonders if, by protecting Shane from his father’s abuse, he could have prevented Shane from being dragged into The Trap of Cycles of Violence.

“‘Son, don’t you understand?’ his father interrupts. ‘We’d spend every last penny we had to help you.’”

In exploring the theme of The Immensity of Parental Love and Sacrifice, the novel offers extreme examples such as Michael killing and dying for his daughter. This quote is a less extreme example of parental love, yet it conveys the same sentiment that parents will go to any length to protect and help their children. Ryan finds himself in prison for being in the wrong place at the wrong time and his parents are going to get him a lawyer to protect him, even if they have to go bankrupt to do it. They are prepared to sacrifice everything they have for him, just like Michael does for his daughter.

“Chaz doesn’t say so, but he doesn’t have vengeance in him anymore. He loved Patrick, but his son was a ruthless killer. A cruel husband. And a callous father. Chaz blames himself. His son was trying to live up to his dad’s reputation. Patrick’s murder is the only thing that saved Davie.”

Chaz is aware that The Trap of Cycles of Violence inevitably claims its victims, including his own son, Patrick, whom he did not treat well. Chaz is resigned to this. He implicitly foresees that it will also claim him and the vengeance-obsessed O’Learys, but he can’t see any escape for them. His only hope is that his grandson will never enter the cycle of violence.

“Don’t drive the Volkswagen. It’s been acting up. I think the engine is going out, so take the other car if you need to drive anywhere. Seriously, it could be dangerous to drive, so…”

This passage is an example of the drily humorous tone that Finlay uses. It doesn’t seem noteworthy except in hindsight: In actuality, Michael has been booby-trapping the Volkswagen with explosives in case the O’Learys find them. When he warns that the car would be dangerous, he means it is actually dangerous for an entirely different reason than the engine going out.

“It’s a blow that carries more weight than mere gunmetal. It carries the memory of a night on a knoll in the rain. Ryan’s thoughts are hazy, he feels throbbing pain, blood dripping in his eyes. But he won’t let her down again.”

This an example of the novel’s circular storytelling, since Ryan once again fights an assailant who is trying to kidnap Alison and that assailant lands a blow to Ryan’s head, just like at Alison’s first abduction. However, this time, the memory of his previous failure helps Ryan to shrug off the blow and redeem himself by subduing Alison’s attacker. In this fight, Finlay employs some of the clichés from the thriller genre, depicting an ordinary man who triumphs over a trained assassin.

“He’d sworn after Iraq that he’d never take another life, but that bridge has been crossed and burned.”

This quotation shows just how far Michael will go to help his daughter, showing The Immensity of Parental Love and Sacrifice. It also shows how he wants to escape his military past with its violence but finds it difficult to do so, highlighting the theme of The Trap of Cycles of Violence.

“They dated for four years, nearly all of high school, yet she’d never trusted him enough to tell him about her past. Tell him her real name. That they were in hiding.”

This quotation shows Ryan’s frustration when he learns the truth about Alison and the secrets she kept from him. It underlines the theme of The Illusory Nature of Personal Identities. Many characters in the novel don’t truly know even those who they believe are closest to them.

“But you’ll never be truly you—not Taylor, not Alison, not Sophia—until you forgive yourself. You’ll never be able to give yourself to someone until you do.”

Ryan, based on his own experience, offers Alison advice for reconciling with her past so it no longer traps her. This is the most explicit statement that the novel offers as a potential solution to The Difficulty of Escaping the Past.

“And in the years since, she’s become a different person. If Alison was the good version of Taylor, Sophia is the melancholy version of both. She has a deep sadness—loneliness—baked into her bones now.”

This passage, in which Alison reflects on herself near the end of the book, shows the cost of her multiple identity changes and living in fear of the past. Because of his past trauma, Ryan found it impossible to open up to another person until he formed a connection with Nora; as Sophia, Alison, too, struggles with loneliness. Without the hope of human connection, sadness has become a core part of who she is.

“He wants to go fishing on his boat, get ice cream with Davie, live his life without having to carry around a piece. Maybe make up for everything he’s done, though he knows that’s not possible.”

Chaz acquires the traits of a tragic character as he reaches the culmination of his character arc. He has committed murder and torture, and while he believes that these actions may be beyond redemption, the innocence of his grandson makes him long for the redemption that he cannot have. This reflection prepares him to make the compassionate choice of releasing Ryan, Poppy, and Alison.

“Another tragedy of all this is Shane and Gina. He remembers them as teenagers. They had this deep connection no one really understood. Probably because both had abusive parents. For all of his brutality, Shane is so gentle with his wife. But she’s not the same Gina anymore. And that’s what’s eating at Shane. Nothing he’s done, nothing he can do, will bring her back.”

In Chaz’s inner monologue, he thinks about The Trap of Cycles of Violence that Shane and Gina are caught in as a “tragedy.” Chaz connects their violence and brutality to them having abusive parents, underlining that many perpetrators of abuse and bullying once were victims themselves.

“For all his faults, he only wanted to take care of his family, spend time with the love of his life, Gina. But there was no coming back from what happened to their son. Whoever said if you’re seeking revenge, dig two graves—one for your enemy and one for yourself—had it almost right. For Shane and Gina, it involved many, many more.”

In the epilogue, Chaz thinks of the tragedy of Shane and Gina’s obsession with violence and how that cycle keeps claiming more lives, highlighting the theme of The Trap of Cycles of Violence. He also muses on Shane’s love for his family, echoing Shane’s tender conversation with Gina in his first appearance in the novel. This serves as a reminder of the traits that make Shane a round character.

“He imagines Sophia in the gallery she opened in Montmartre. When they last spoke, she was still searching for the Alison Lane inside herself. He hopes she’ll find her.”

The final mention of Alison is bittersweet. While Ryan and Poppy find a happy ending and Michael at least achieves his goal of protecting his daughter, Alison remains caught between the past and present. The use of the word “hopes” underlines that Alison may or may not escape her past and find peace.