Ghosts

This chapter consists of a string of text messages from Nina to Max. She sends him a text on November 20, but there is no response. She texts again the following day, and Max responds with “[It] was lovely to see you” (131). Nina responds the following day, November 22, but Max doesn’t reply. Nina calls on November 25 and follows with a text message expressing concern that she hasn’t heard from him. Max’s response is curt and distant. Nina sends another text inviting Max to dinner, but he says he has to work, and they have the same exchange on November 27. Nina texts on November 29, then again on December 1. When Max doesn’t respond, she calls him. He finally responds by text, claiming that he is busy with work. After several days of silence, Nina sends a text explaining that his behavior is unkind and confusing. Max finally responds on December 7 but offers no clear explanation for his distance. Nina sends several more messages explaining how Max’s actions are hurtful and cowardly. If he no longer wants to see her, he should just be honest. Nina calls him on December 19 and sends one last text, but he doesn’t respond.

Nina admits to Lola that she thinks Max might be dead. Lola shows Nina how to use social media and WhatsApp to track Max’s movements; however, he doesn’t use any of the apps. Moreover, they can’t find his profile on Linx, which, according to Lola, “means he either deleted the app and his profile […] Or he’s unmatched you” (138). Nina complains about how difficult it is for women to date in their thirties because men hold all the cards. Lola explains her theory that millennial men grew up playing video games and therefore view all relationships as leveling up instead of finding a partner. She explains, “‘I love you’ is the relationship equivalent of Level 17 of Tomb Raider 2” (140). This theory depresses Nina, but Lola assures her that she will get past this heartache.

Bill goes missing, and Nina races to her parents’ home, where family friend Gloria seems more worried about having to cancel the book club meeting that night than about finding Bill. Nancy has alerted the authorities, but Nina doesn’t want to wait. While sitting alone in her childhood bedroom, she recalls the night with Max in Albyn Square and the power of her memories of home. She thinks Bill may have traveled back to his childhood home in Bethnal Green and decides to go look for him. When she arrives at the house, a kind lady answers and already knows why she is there. The woman explains that she recognized the signs of dementia as soon as Bill arrived, so she kept him comfortable and served him tea. Bill is convinced that his mother is still there and refuses to leave without seeing her. The woman says it is best not to refute the hallucinations because they are very real to him. Nina coaxes Bill to leave, explaining that they will return another time when his mother is home. On the cab ride home, Bill combs through his memories of his mother, Marjorie, and his father who left them when he was 10 years old. At home, Nina remains calm around her father, labeling their trip as a bit of “nostalgia,” and Bill quotes the Greek form of the word, nostos álgos. Later, Nina looks up the word, which translates to “pain from an old wound” (151).

Nina and Nancy meet with a nurse named Gwen, who will begin helping them with Bill’s care. Gwen first meets with Nina’s mother alone, since she is Bill’s primary caregiver, and Nina thinks about how her mother is good at many things but being a caregiver isn’t one of them. When Nina joins the meeting, she and her mother argue over the details of Bill’s care. Gwen remains cheery and suggests putting a curtain over the door to prevent Bill from leaving. She also agrees with Nina about not dismissing his fixed false ideas and instead responding sensitively so as not to further agitate or confuse him.

Nina returns home to experiment with a tomato soup recipe that reminds her of her childhood. Later, she hears loud music coming from Angelo’s apartment. Nina asks her upstairs neighbor, Alma, if the music is bothering her, but she says no because Nina’s apartment absorbs most of the noise. Alma asks Nina about Max, but she doesn’t tell her about his disappearance. Alma says that she loved every day of her 58 years of marriage and that Max and Nina will marry soon. Nina waits until 11:00 pm to call the council and report the noise ordinance violation. She listens as the council members confront Angelo and he asks, “Was it her?” (160). After the council members leave, Angelo walks upstairs and stands outside Nina’s apartment for a long time. He finally leaves, but she wishes that she could call Max for comfort. She looks through their old texts and wonders if she dreamed their entire relationship. She has an epiphany that they never really knew each other that well, and concedes that she missed many signs that he might not be ready for a committed relationship. She deletes his number, her way of accepting that he is no longer a part of her life.