Forgive Me, Leonard Peacock

Leonard finds pink wrapping paper and wraps four presents for his friends. He also places his gun inside a cigar box and wraps it, wary of a bag check at school. The gifts for Leonard’s friends symbolize “that what’s going to happen today isn’t their fault” (5). He also wants to commemorate his own birthday today. 

Herr Silverman, Leonard’s Holocaust teacher, never exposes his arms. Leonard wonders if Herr Silverman’s sleeves conceal evidence of a suicide attempt. He imagines other traumas Herr Silverman might have endured and how the truth might enlighten him. He also imagines Herr Silverman shaming Leonard for asking about his sleeves. Leonard wonders about the Nazi who once possessed his gun. 

Leonard depicts his “signature really long dirty-blond hair that hangs over my eyes and past my shoulders” (11). In a footnote, Leonard describes his father, Ralph Peacock, a one-hit-wonder rock star who showed signs of alcoholism and drug addiction. The authorities chased Ralph Peacock for tax evasion. He told Leonard goodbye and gave him the Nazi gun before he exited the country, leaving Leonard and his mother Linda in financial ruin.

In the present, Leonard cuts off all his hair and leaves it, wrapped, as a joke gift for his mother. Leonard imagines Linda pretending to grieve his death and moving to Paris with her boyfriend Jean-Luc. Leonard stares at his reflection in a mirror, hating his appearance, and tells the face he will kill him that day. He hears a voice answer, “Promise?” (15), and feels frightened. He breaks the mirror. 

Leonard visits his elderly friend and neighbor Walt, whom he met after Linda urged her son to shovel the snow in Walt’s driveway. That day, Walt invited Leonard to watch Humphrey Bogart films with him, which began their friendship. Leonard also helps Walt, who has poor respiratory health, secure inexpensive cigarettes online. 

Leonard finds Walt in an armchair, and the friends trade quotes from their beloved Humphrey Bogart movies: “He looks at me with his best black-and-white movie-star face14 and says, ‘You despise me, don’t you?’ It’s a line from Casablanca, which we’ve watched together a million times” (19).

Leonard worries that Walt will discover his plan and feels sad that he will no longer see his friend after today. He also scolds Walt for using a slur against gay men upon seeing the pink wrapping paper. Inside is a fedora, to Walt’s delight. Leonard lies that Humphrey Bogart sported the hat in the film The Maltese Falcon. Walt’s expression indicates that he senses Leonard’s lie. 

The two exchange more Bogart quotes, and Leonard wishes Walt could deliver him from his fate. Walt asks Leonard a battery of worried questions. Leonard abruptly leaves Walt’s home. 

The body of this chapter is a letter addressed to “First Lieutenant Leonard” (27) from Commander E. The Commander addresses Leonard from 20 years in the future. In the year 2032, the two will work together at a lighthouse in Philadelphia, now located underwater because climate change and nuclear war have transformed the earth. Even the United States of America no longer exists, and humanity lives inside skyscrapers. 

The authorities and other transportation seem to have forgotten Commander E and Leonard at Outpost 37, Lighthouse 1. The small crew persists, eating from a large stockpile and spending extended time in irradiated air. Leonard’s favorite pastimes are describing the lives lived in Philadelphia before it flooded and scuba diving through the city. Commander E expresses sympathy for Leonard’s current circumstances and urges him to keep living so he can experience the lighthouse.