Because of the Rabbit

Lord packs Emma’s first day with emotional volatility. The day begins with Emma’s excitement and enthusiasm at the prospect of finding friends, followed by uncertainty and self-doubt when she’s confronted with new expectations and opinionated personalities. Disappointment, frustration, and humiliation overwhelm Emma when she faces an indifferent lunchroom, leaving sadness as her predominant emotion when she gets home. Gabe’s decision to let Emma keep Lapi restores her joyful mood in the evening; Emma goes to bed cautiously optimistic, with a plan in place to pursue her quest to find friends.

These chapters explore The Importance of Authenticity and The Complexity of Making Friends. Owen’s words about first impressions, “kids don’t give you too many chances” (57), stick with Emma and initially outweigh his other advice: “Be Yourself.” Emma is self-conscious and doesn’t reveal her true self: She feels uncomfortable being shown to her classroom by a younger kid and doesn’t share that she was homeschooled, afraid she will be unfairly judged. Lord underscores Emma’s insecurity when Emma changes her truth about hatching frogs in her bathroom to the “lie” and fibs about loving pickles, desperate for Leah and Iris to like her.

Lord shows that Emma has a long way to go before she feels comfortable with herself. Emma feels disappointed to be teamed with Jack and embarrassed to be at “the Leftovers Table” with him and Dustin (71). Her desire to fit in and be accepted by the popular girls prevents her from noticing that Jack would be a wonderful friend. Emma’s behavior does not necessarily reflect negatively on her; rather, it provides insight into her difficulties adjusting to change. Emma yearns to be included at the cool girls’ table, oblivious to the potential friend sitting right beside her. When Emma finally focuses on Jack, she realizes that he is funny and knows a lot about animals. However, the disconnect between how Emma had imagined the first day of school and its reality eclipses everything else, leaving her to conclude: “Maybe public school just isn’t for me” (78).

In these chapters, Emma continues to personify her emotions as sentient beings with human qualities. For example, when Emma remembers that they must take Lapi to the shelter she says: “In the race, both Excited and Scared had sat down on the sidelines now. Sad was the only one running” (80). Not only has Emma become deeply attached to Lapi; she also uses Lapi as a conversation starter. He gives her something unrelated to homeschooling to talk about, a much-needed icebreaker. Emma is beginning to doubt that Lapi is bringing her “rabbit magic,” but feels joy and renewed optimism when Gabe lets her keep him. The comfort that Emma derives from having Lapi contrasts with the grief she feels about her perceived loss of Owen: “I’d been carrying a hole inside me since Owen went off to school last year and this little rabbit had jumped right into that hole and made himself at home” (87). Lapi softens the impact of Owen’s busy new schedule, bolstering her as she grows into her own new life at school. Lord shows Emma’s pride in Lapi, her home, and family by her desire to invite the group to her house. Here, “the other kids would be in my world instead of me trying to fit into theirs […] We’d have such a great time that it’d bounce us right over the friendship bump” (89).